LAUS DEO

Caught in flip-flops, Part 2

Forgive me. I apologize sincerely to all the pretty feet readers who have read my blogs and wear flip-flops. Forgive me for sharing my flip-flop sandal aversion in glib or flippant words.

Yes, I have rid my closet of flip-flops, which meant I did wear them. They’re gone but still I hang onto an invisible pair, my cheap flip-flops of mental trust and mistrust. In them my fallen arches of faith easily tire. The soles of my conviction toughen in stubborn pride while the skin between the big and second toe crack raw red from disappointments.

Surely these flip-flops are “Made in Fear.” My fellow countrymen exist in that fear land. They know someone who is jobless. They know a family on the dole. Or they know one of the nearly million discouraged workers no longer searching, not in the unemployed numbers. For this mom it’s been many anxious years waiting for her grown children to find good, sustainable employment.

My daughter Maria had an interview the week before in a setting we believed was her beloved niche, the library. After all, her beloved hero, her late grandmother earned a masters and fine position as a media specialist/librarian.

It’s been seven years since my Maria’s heard her grandma’s pep talks and seen her frugal, exemplary life in God’s word. In those years my daughter has moved to two states, scrapped through temporary jobs, gone back to school, filled out too many job applications, and endured braces. My thrifty girl has never been on the dole, though she has a father who provides for her and lends her “his Elantra” as she calls it.

Today's the last day of the week that the interviewer said he would contact her up or down about the job. I suggested she check out her Bible and call her job counselor. I caught her jotting Bible verses. Then she called the counselor who had her call the interviewer who reneged on his statement. Now her counselor will try to wiggle a work-study job for my girl.

I hear my Maria chat with her brother, just back from another day of job hunting with his counselor. I hide in my bedroom, typing through tears, wearing mental flip-flops.

My Maria just came in to update me about her brother’s job search. She gave me a hug, a big hug. I asked for it, but she gave it. Can you imagine? Then I asked her about the Bible verses she jotted.

“It’s from Lamentations,” she explained, then read aloud,

“Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope. 

Because of the Lord’s great love 

we are not consumed for his compassions never fail. 

They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” (niv)

Beside my laptop her 2 by 5 inch notepaper sits. I notice my Maria’s comment below the Lamentations’ verse: “He is faithful. May the Lord be exalted forever.”

Oh God, you forgive me!